He, He, He (24 weeks)

Beforehand, I went back and forth a few times about whether I wanted to find out the sex or not.  James and I discussed it quite a few times, with both sides winning at one point or the other.  Well, not really - James never agreed that there was any reason to keep it secret, but within my own mind, it was a very definite back and forth.
Anyway!  I finally decided that I wanted to know.  And I'm so glad I did.

It's been amazing knowing who it is in there.  Every step along the way, I've really enjoyed each thing that makes it that little less metaphorical and a little more real.  But this one is a big one.  It's not an either or, it's a boy.  A little boy.  It's our son.  We're waiting for him.  He is really active.  He is getting bigger.  He will be here soon.

He, He, He.

It is fantastic knowing.  It has made him a person and an individual.  James was right, and I was wrong.  Saving it so that I have some sort of epic surprise at the end, as fantastic and fun as that surprise would be, is denying what is actually important.  Yes, there are many reasons to want to keep it a secret.  But those reasons were mostly for me, and that is not what is important in the end.  Knowing who he is acknowledges him as an individual human being and allows us to begin loving him.  The love we already felt was a generic love without specific direction and now it feels directional.

That sounds like we love him more because we found out he is a boy, and that's not what I mean.  It would be exactly the same if we found out that we were having a girl.  The difference is the connection that comes with knowing.  It would have happened either way.  And it would have happened even if we waited until the birth to find out.  We're just very lucky that we live in a time when it's possible for it to happen sooner.

I imagine it would be even more special if we could begin referring to him by name... but unfortunately that is not currently possible.  Why is it so hard?!  We had the perfect girl's name picked out.  And nothing for a boy.  And still nothing for a boy.  A few that we like, but none that makes us say "yes!  that's perfect!"  We've gone through name books, lists, every boy we know... still stuck.  So we kinda know who it is in there... and kinda don't.  I know there is plenty of time, but still - I would love if he, he, he could have a name.

Regardless though, I'm over the moon for a little boy.  And so glad to know.

On a separate note, I feel like I've exploded this week (though I know I've said that before... umm... two weeks ago?!).  But still - I thought you were supposed to grow a centimeter a week... if this is what it looks like to go up by a centimeter, I'm going to be doomed by week 40!  It's certainly more than 4 centimeters since month 5 though... is this what they call "popping?"  If so, I think I've "popped."  Have a look at this, if you don't believe me...

Six month progression (with one month = 4 weeks)

But anyway.  We decided to take some normal photos at the same time as the weekly one, and I wanted to share... I particularly liked trying to keep a straight face to recreate the I'm-pregnant-and-oh-so-contemplative pose.  It's quite funny... see if you can spot it.